How to Ruin Your Life - Please Learn From My Mistake

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RobRegish
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How to Ruin Your Life - Please Learn From My Mistake

Post by RobRegish »

To everyone who's on board with me, The Blueprint and building muscle - a very important warning: This took some very painful introspection and 2 days to put together. Yet if it saves just one of you, it will be worth it.

Please read every word before it's too late.. it already is for me*.

I offer it here to you in the hopes your life isn't ruined. Mine already has been*.

_____________________________________________________________

THE MESSAGE: Please don't let lifting, PR's and the gym define you, your life or your view of the world.

I have no idea how old you are or where you're at in life. I would however, like you to read the following very carefully. I am typing this now alone in a hotel room, estranged from my beautiful wife and son.

You know why?

Because I spent too much time focusing on me, you and our mutual facination with the world of muscle.

DON'T GET ME WRONG: I don't regret helping you and others one second, considering the gifts I was given.

"THE DISEASE"

Before I get going you should know something. Something very important and most are unaware of. You know those "pro's" you see in the newstand magazines and elsewhere? The greek gods all using Weider Mega-Packs/Mega-Bullshit? The pro's call it "The Disease".

I know b/c I penetrated their world, much as I did another world you'll be reading about. Both are/were protected sub-cultures complete with gatekeepers, secret languages and other padlocks designed to protect it.

It's referred to as the disease behind closed doors and only amongst those they trust. It's the lifting bug you catch. Many of you already have.
It's a deal you'll enter into and every deal asks something of you - you'll pay a price to enter this deal. In this case, the price isn't obvious and they don't mention it when you sign up. It's all free see... free for the asking. Don't be fooled..

Once you seal that deal and have the bug, it'll likely stick around for awhile. For people like me, it lasts a lifetime. What's more important is where, when and how it starts.

I'm terming it "The Moment" and you'll be reading about that below. It is a dangerous moment and presents itself as all upside. This isn't the whole truth and it is anything but black and white. In fact, it is a complex deal that can blind and destroy you.

Like any legal agreement you'll be asked to sign, it isn't written in English. Legal agreements are written in "lawyer", not English. There's a reason for this and it isn't a good one - its by design such that you don't really understand it. You need to understand this going in...

THE GOOD THAT EXISTS IN "THE MOMENT"

Big.Jaz is on his way to the WORLDS. Turboflex, Hank! and many, many others are realizing their dreams. I know because I get their emails, PM's and phone calls daily now. I am forever grateful. As with many things in life though, I paid a price for my investment. A very steep price indeed..

THE BAD THAT EXISTS, THE EVIL AND THE TRAGEDY THAT CAN BEFALL YOU

You see that 5 year old little man in my avatar? I haven't seen him in almost a month. Despite his hard look in that pic (where do you suppose he picked this up?), 99.9% of the time he's smiling and has a disposition that would melt your heart. Almost all of this can be credited to my wife, Jenifer. I used to refer to her as "my Jen" in my mind when she was mentioned or I thought of her.

It's unclear if I will ever see them again, except perhaps in a court of law.

Notice how both Good, Bad, Ugly and Tragedy resulted from the same moment I'll be speaking to. I need you to take note of this.

BE ON GUARD FOR "THE MOMENT"

What follows may seem odd, suspect or even disturbing. As someone that has seemingly lost everything, I don't particularly care much what people think. So here goes; This was my moment - yours will almost certainly be different. For many here, it has likely already occurred. For others (those in your formative years... teens and early 20's) it looms somewhere in your future.

I need you to do 1 of 2 things. Right now, today before it's too late:

1.) Be on the lookout for it if it hasn't happened yet and
2.) Go back in time now and search for it... even in you suspect it hasn't happened yet.

You need to pinpoint and be wary of this moment... because it can both enrich and destroy your life. I experienced both.

What appeared to be very black and white to me was really laced with shades of gray. Shades of gray that only became clear decades later and nearly claimed my life last week.

Today, things aren't looking much better. In fact, they are much worse.

MY MOMENT: EXAMPLE OF WHAT TO LOOK FOR

I had no idea when I arose on January 23rd 1984, turned the TV on that this moment would come to both forever scar and define me; Hulk Hogan defeating The Iron Sheik* in Madison Square Garden:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zEMA4zmeDUQ&NR=1

This moment tee'd up the very first Wrestlemania, where yet another mainstream muscleman - Mr. T got involved. He was all over TV at the time, so this had to be legit. If you think that's funny*, check this out... The original closed circuit footage of Wrestlemania I from Madison Square Garden:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B4PlUjDb ... re=related

*My boy The Iron Sheik is right there at the 28 sec. mark, standing against the wall in a snazzy plaid jacket as Hogan, Mr. T and Jimmy Snuka turn the corner :)

I met him about 5 years ago. At least he's really from Iran. Like virtually everyone else in the business though, he's an absolute mess today. I met Jimmy "Superfly" Snuka too, in Pittsfield, MA (thanks again Johnny Gray). Jimmy's so shot, he makes the Sheik look like he's got his act together. Quite a statement given Sheik couldn't match his pointy boots if you put a gun to his head..

This moment was pre-determined yes, (still hate the F word.. "fake"), but the magic of the moment was not. It only happens when everything else falls into place. Some of these things are beyond the scope of the orchestrater's control. On this night though, the stars aligned perfectly and my world exploded. I wasn't the only one...

What you see here in terms of stimulus/response between one man and the public was and still is very, very real. Companies hire marketing firms and Madison Avenue to try and create moments like this every day. It happens once every 10-15 years or so. Success is defined as the moment lasting and being re-created in various forms for another 10-15 years. A consistent, healthy revenue stream that comes along for the ride is the other qualifier.

To be clear, I don't fault anyone for this. The man, the companies involved etc. all worked very, very hard and the financial and other rewards followed. This is the same simple formula I seek to create here for me, you and others. Why?

Because as my situation so painfully illustrates....when its not in your hands (prior layoffs, wife leaving you) - you lose. Not always but consider the following:

1.) 60% plus of all marriages now end in divorce
2.) Over 10 million people in this country just found out the hard way, you can lose your job for reasons other than your performance/personal contributions to the company you work for

You want to gamble given those odds? Think long and hard before answering.

THE GOOD THE MOMENT DOES

Terry Boella's character (Hulk Hogan) was and still is a positive role model. He preached about the training, the prayers and the vitamins as being the fix. I believed this with every fiber of my being. I lived it, ate it and breathed it for 27 years. It did many positive things for me and per Hogan himself... saved his life. I never took steroids, a shortcut in the gym nor as much as smoked a cigarette. Never had a problem with alcohol either. To this day my one brush with the law involves a ticket for a right on red.

People laughed at me for this, but I stood strong. Why? Because I saw the payoff every day of playing it straight. Specifically, I saw it in the gym. While those that strayed from the straight and narrow faultered, I quickly surpassed them. I physically grew stronger, faster and outperformed almost every one of them. Even the ones using steroids.

That's right, this fuel I stumbled upon was that powerful.

Terry Boella didn't always take the high road during his life. He has stated as much. Hulk Hogan had to though... because when you're at the top of the Make a Wish Foundation's list to visit dying children - you need to up your game.

THE BAD IT DOES

Everything I experienced during these formative years (the 1980's) reinforced the fact that these man gods (Hogan, Stallone, Schwarzenneger etc) had the keys to my kingdom:

Muscle and lots of it

They had the women, the money and all the toys that went with that scene. They lived large in Lear-Jets, limos and lavish lifestyles. I know because I sought them out. I waited outside arenas, snuck into hotels, sat in airports and even disguised myself (as you'll read below) to sneak into their world. To see for myself if this was for real.

It was all there.... or so it seemed.

THE UGLY

Because I failed to realize all of my success took place in the gym and on the platform during competition (all answers pointed toward the gym, see), I was oblivious to the fact I was falling behind outside of it. I graduated with straight A's, a supportive family and a world of possibilities before me. Yet none of this meant a thing to me.

The same people I was so soundly defeating in the gym had girlfriends, celebrated New Years Eve and were contributing to society in other areas of life. I either failed to realize this or worse, didn't care.

THE DEAL, THE DEVIL AND THE CONSEQUENCES YOU FACE WHEN YOU ACCEPT

I sacrificed all of these things to get to where I wanted to be. This is part of the deal you make with the Devil to achieve your goals. You will bleed, you will sweat and you will sacrifice. Many of you know exactly what I'm talking about.

Except I (and perhaps you) had no idea I was entering into this "deal".

Whether you believe in God, The Devil (good/evil) or whatever you want to call it - this "deal" is very, very real. Many of you have already bought in... either knowingly or unknowingly.

I just realized now while typing this that I reinforce this deal every time I express my happiness for your success. When you achieve your goals with The Blueprint, my counsel or any of the information I bring to the table I am sincerely elated. My words of encouragement are meant with the best of intentions. Important for me that you understand this...

Yet this too, is now revealed as a wolf in sheep's clothing. It's something else I need you to keep tabs on...

I'm warning you now: Beware the consequences

ROB MEETS HIS IDOL - VIA SOME NECESSARY SUBTERFUGE

I was 17 years old, understood the world of pro-wrestling was still a "protected/closed" world and would require some work to penetrate. In fact, in the presence of a known "outsider", they revert to their own language... a form of pig latin known as "kayfabe".

Bad guys never associated with good guys and vice versa. Their antennas were always up to detect when outsiders were around. In fact, people known as "road agents" were and still are in charge of "gatekeeping" so to speak, when they were on the road. Fortunately for me, no road agents had arrived at the arena yet. It was a TV taping so I knew enough to arrive early.

Accordingly, I borrowed a suit and enlisted the support of a neighbor to properly fashion a neck tie. I dug deep for the real names of the wrestlers. I had to... there was no internet then. I worked the phones for months and chased people down. In retrospect, fine training for my future career in insurance.

Drawing upon every ounce of legitimacy as I could (which is to say none - I studied others and copied them), I matter of factly strolled up to the guard desk at the arena, then asked if Jim Harris had arrived yet. Jim is/was otherwise known as The Great Kamala and was Hogan's opponent for the night. Pretty face right here:

https://webcache.googleusercontent.com/s ... google.com

He was billed as being from Uganda, "The Ugandan Giant", spoke no English and could only be controlled by his "handler", Kim Chi. I informed the guard I was a family friend and had an urgent message related to the health of a family member.

Notice he's an African American man and I'm as white as a gallon of milk. The white/black friendship thing was still questionable in my mind at the time, although college was helpful in breaking free from that sickness. Bless you Jeanne Giddens, wherever you are today..

When Jim/Kamala finally arrived he did so driving a rented Lincoln town car (he's straight from the jungle, remember) and settled down to a game of cards with The Bushwackers, all the while speaking fluent English. The Whackers were two nutjobs allegedly from NZ. God only knows what their real story is. They're probably former garbage men from NJ.

Think that's a stretch?

Chief Jay Strongbow's gimmick was an American Indian, complete with the feathered head dress and Indian war dance. He's really a Jewish man from NJ, now retired and living on a farm in Georgia:

https://obsessedwithwrestling.com/profil ... ongbow.php

Notice he isn't married. That may or may not be relevant but if you study these people.... he's one of the lucky ones. Most are now dead:

https://www.deadwrestlers.net/

Back on point: I was instructed to wait in a chair across from the guard, so I settled in for a bit. As soon as the guard left his station, I made my move - allegedy to a soda machine, just in case he returned. I then stood in a innocent enough looking hallway, oblivious to what was coming next....

Ten minutes later, a pair of double doors swung open. A sea of reporters, arena employees and other wrestlers who were standing around then parted. You know, as if in the Bible - the part about the Red Sea? Everyone moved toward the walls to make way for the man and the moment. It was Hogan and he was walking tall. Everyone gave him room and melted away.

Think it was just me? Think again.

It was 1 month prior to Wrestlemania III and his match with Andre' The Giant. Mainstream media NBC camera crews were there, along with Bob Costas. He had become involved prior and is seen here at 5:46 before 23,000 people and millions more watching on MTV proclaiming what an honor it was to be involved:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DX35ob7njrY

At exactly 7:10, Hogan brushes aside and completly eclipses the celebraties of the day including Cindy Lauper, Gloria Steinman, Danny DeVito and real heroes like NYC's finest, working security for the show.

If you don't believe that, study the faces in the crowd from 7:16 - 7:20. Just 4 seconds will illustrate the spell everyone was under.

You need to see this because it demonstrates how 23,000 people either knowingly or unknowingly validated for me and millions of others this was the truth. It still get chills running down my spine despite the fact it's partially responsible for destroying my life.

The local TV crews were there too the day I met him, all pursued him. It registered with complete strangers who weren't even fans (arena employees I had come to know and others via the local pro hockey farm team).

There was no denying it - something special was going on.

I knew I would never be closer and it was now or never. As Hogan came closer, I stepped forward to extend my hand.

He was everything I expected and more: physically enormous, complete with an aura and presence about him unlike anything I'd ever seen before (or since). Again, the business isn't "real" (I understood this) but the inspiration, aura and resulting feelings were real. They were tangible and a very laid back, conservative person (me) all of a sudden felt very, very much alive. And I liked that..

A LOT..

This wasn't a cartoon charcter in the pages of some comic book. He was standing before me in real life flesh and blood, all 6'5", 302lbs of him - shaking my hand. He had "the look" in his eye too. I cannot articulate for you what this is. You either know what I'm saying here or you don't. It was real and it was there...

I internalized all of it.

We exchanged greetings. A 2 min conversation ensued before he had to go.... there were sick children to visit in a room just yards away. I watched as he entered the room, was briefed by someone and was directed toward a child. He knelt down to whisper to her in a wheelchair, then did the same for many others. They too, felt it. Some of them for the very last time.

Ten minutes later, he was ushered elsewhere and I left the building before being exposed.

WHAT HAPPENED NEXT

Just days later (March 29th, 1987 to be exact) Hogan vs. Andre' the Giant outdrew the Pope at the Pontiac Silverdome. That's right, Wrestelmania III drew 93,173 fans to see this man-God slam a 500lbs giant and send Evil packing.....seemingly handing him his ass on a silver platter.

This was the pinnacle. Good had defeated evil and 93,000+ saw it live with their own eyes. That indoor attendance record btw, still stands today. If a picture is worth 93,173 words... this is it:

https://www.wwe.com/shows/wrestlemania/h ... m3/photos/

Pope John Paul II? He drew 85,000 the week prior. Even the Rolling Stones were usurped that month (prior to WMIII), again at the Silverdome.

All of that just reinforced I was on the right track...

THE PSYCHOLOGICAL FALLOUT AND CONSEQUENCES

Today, I still equate size/power and physical condition with self worth, though I'm getting help to better manage it. I internalized so much of it I'll never be totally free from it. Don't make this mistake.

I went on to meet many of these men later in life, only to learn they were mere mortals like you and I. In fact, most are dead now. The rest have largely ruined their lives, others around them or both. Here's John Graziano, a former US Marine with two tours of duty in Iraq. In other words, a real hero. He lies in a bed today, still alive but missing part of his head. The victim of a car accident in which Hogan's son was driving:

WARNING: These are graphic pictures. I hope you have a strong stomach. If you don't, take my advice and skip them..

https://www.google.com/images?q=john+gra ... 03&bih=544

To be clear, I wish this on no one. Not Hogan, his son nor of course John Graziano or his family. It was an accident... but do the math on how many 17 year olds drive tricked up Toyota Supras like this. He had and still has access to/drives around in an entire fleet of exotic cars. You can't tell me he does so without his Father's life of fame, fortune and privilege.

Again, I don't begrudge him for this; he earned it, using the same simple formula I spoke to earlier. The way the world should work, in my opinion. You deliver the goods, you reap the rewards. There's nothing subjective about it. He drew money and tons of it... an ass every 18 inches as they say in the business.

Prior to this tragedy, there were 3 incidents that should have prevented it;

In the first incident, on Sept. 17, 2006, Nick was pulled over for doing 115 mph in a 70 mph zone. He completed traffic school for that one.

For his second offense, he was clocked doing 57 in a 30. For his third bust, the little Hulkster was clocked doing 106 in a 70.

This is what happens when one moment in time explodes and spills over into your and other people's lives.

I implore you.... please don't make the same mistake I did.

Bless you all for reading this,

ROB
_____________________________________________________________

*I will never give up.

Read that again: Never

Too many are now counting on me. I haven't lived a bad life by any means - but I've made some mistakes. Mistakes that almost cost me my life and apparently... a beautiful wife and 5 year old son.

Much like the Hulk Hogan character saved Terry Bollea, I'm hoping Mixelflick can save Rob. That's the only hope I can see that's left.

Don't worry, I'll ultimately survive (and thrive). Always do when my back's against the wall.... Ironically though, in part it'll be because of "The Moment".

Beware your moment
Street-dreams
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Post by Street-dreams »

Im sorry to hear that Rob. If theres anything I can do to help let me know
tufluk
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Post by tufluk »

inspiring stuff
i couldn't see the vid because it said it was a faulty url
but if lifting weights is a big part of your life I strongly recommend a documentary called "bigger, faster, stronger"
i think you can watch it all on youtube.
there's more to life that what advertisers of muscle would have you believe, in some causes the pursuit of this image is life ruining and even fatal.
TURBOFLEX
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Post by TURBOFLEX »

Thanks for sharing with us Rob... I understand where your coming from, I guess the passion that we all share can sneak up and bite you sometimes.. It takes so much dedication, heart, will power and every ounce of who we are to reach the goals and realize our dreams.. Sometimes it puts more than we are willing to risk at stake..

I hope we all learn but yet another valuable lesson from you Rob, and I know we all will to.. Because that's the beauty of this place.. We feed off eachothers victories and learn from eachothers mistakes... And as good students, we are like our good teacher and will NEVER give up!!

Onward and upward my BP family!!... Its the only direction we know!!
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LIFT2beHUGE
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Post by LIFT2beHUGE »

Wow, Rob. You really shared a lot here... God's blessings will find you. Welcome back BOSS.
nigh70wl
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Post by nigh70wl »

Rob, I thank you for sharing this.
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RobRegish
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Post by RobRegish »

Fantastic news!!

I had the opportunity to see Nicholas Maximus today. We played dinosaurs for hours. Here's what went down...

Maximus: "Here Daddy.. TRex and Stegasaurus are going to fight. TRex is a carnivor and Stegasaurus is an herbivore".

Who's going win?

Daddy: "Nicholas, why do they have to fight? Can't they just be friends"?

HERE'S HOW I KNOW HE'S MINE

Maximus: "No Daddy, because there are no meat trees..."

Honest to God...
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JML2011
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Post by JML2011 »

RobRegish wrote:Fantastic news!!

I had the opportunity to see Nicholas Maximus today. We played dinosaurs for hours. Here's what went down...

Maximus: "Here Daddy.. TRex and Stegasaurus are going to fight. TRex is a carnivor and Stegasaurus is an herbivore".

Who's going win?

Daddy: "Nicholas, why do they have to fight? Can't they just be friends"?

HERE'S HOW I KNOW HE'S MINE

Maximus: "No Daddy, because there are no meat trees..."

Honest to God...

Thumbs up X infinity.
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askmass
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Post by askmass »

Nick is The Champ!

Love that kid.
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Big.jazayrli
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Post by Big.jazayrli »

RobRegish wrote:Fantastic news!!

I had the opportunity to see Nicholas Maximus today. We played dinosaurs for hours. Here's what went down...

Maximus: "Here Daddy.. TRex and Stegasaurus are going to fight. TRex is a carnivor and Stegasaurus is an herbivore".

Who's going win?

Daddy: "Nicholas, why do they have to fight? Can't they just be friends"?

HERE'S HOW I KNOW HE'S MINE

Maximus: "No Daddy, because there are no meat trees..."

Honest to God...
YES! THAT IS EPIC!
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RobRegish
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Post by RobRegish »

I want you guys to know.... all of you: YOU were a big part of the reason I was given this second chance.

And when I say big, I mean BIG.

See, it goes like this.... there are a whole lotta' people out there who are wondering if Rob can beat this. You guys never blinked. Not once.

Because you know this...

When my back's against the wall, I do not do not run. I do not hide and I do not fail those that put their trust in me.

I deliver

Not the least of which is my little man right there. Daddy's getting his family back.

Period. End of story...
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JML2011
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Post by JML2011 »

I will keep you in my prayers as well as your family in hopes that things will come together as they should!

With due time...
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the_buffer
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Post by the_buffer »

As I was reading this I was reminded of when I was so involved in filmmaking that it became my way of life. Obsession can come in many forms, it seems most men are victims to it, and it seems that most women hate that it distracts us from them.
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Post by warriorcookie »

I remember when my wife and i hit a patch like this when we had been engaged for a while. I tend to obsess, and well... I guess I have to reel myself in every now and then.

Rob, you are a champion. You have what it takes to use this second chance to make your marriage and your relationship with your son even stronger.

I know how it feels when you are on the verge of something amazing. Your attention always being pulled that direction. Then the important things (wife, kids, family) feel like they are pulling in the opposite direction. In the end I don't know if it's getting everything pulling in the same direction, or maybe just the opposite, maybe it's about balance. I am far too young to know beyond all doubt which is more true. Perhaps circumstance dictates this...

Two books that changed my marriage and my view on relationships in general are "Five Love Languages" and "Wild at Heart"

I know guys, sounds cheese, but hey, we're here improving ourselves. Working towards being better and stronger than we have ever been before. Books make the mind (and soul) strong. We need balance.


edit: btw Rob, this goes without saying, but your bp army is here for you. Let us know when you need something from us. If you need to lay low for a while to focus on your family, I'm sure Hank and the boys (sorry, there's alot of you, too many to start listing) will take care of business again.
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